One hell of a year

imageI’ve been very quiet ..

I kind of vanished of the craft blog earth ..

Life happened.

And what a hell of a year it has been.

He left me on Xmas day 2016 and what a day to leave your family on.

A year of messed up hell. I use to be the most organised and controlled person going, driven to thrive and succeed in my family life and professional career. Now I just literally take each day as it comes. Good or bad, it’s just a day. No future planning, no forward thinking, no organisation, nothing, I just wake up each day and see what happens.

I thought my dad was the biggest narcissist I knew until the man I called my fiancé and father of my child left me sobbing uncontrollably, holding onto my living room door frame, crumbling to the floor in pain and agony at him walking out on his family. In that moment I should of seen the evil in him, the lack of compassion and empathy .. No direct eye contact but I could see the smirk on his face at the pain he was inflicting on me with not even a flinch of remorse. The Bastard enjoyed it.

The row started all because I shared a stupid meme on Facebook aimed at his family. I didn’t see no wrong in sharing something that was an indirect dig (yes okay very childish dig) regarding the lack of effort his family made to be apart of my daughter’s life. My daughter was there granddaughter and niece but not an ounce of effort was made towards her and guess fucking what? Nearly a year later of being split up from her dad and do you think any of them have even ONCE asked about her wellbeing .. NOPE! Not even her own dad makes the effort to ask about her wellbeing. Let’s just say I’ve proved my point I was and I will always be right on that one none of them give a shit about her and her wellbeing then and now. Including her own father.

Sad story is her dad wanted out. He used the shitest excuse going by using the meme as a last straw to the breakdown of our relationship and then proceeded to declare how unhappy and miserable he was with me and basically left me up shit street in every aspect with a big fucking broken heart.

I actually found out he was having an affair in the end with a woman who had exactly the same name as me but looked the total opposite she had dark hair and eyes. The weridest fucking thing in the world, especially when your talking to the girls about it all and have to refer to the mistresses surname instead, it made it much easier and less confusing at the time.

My ex at first meet is a charming and charismatic man, friendly and polite, he  seems like Prince Charming riding on a horse who is going to give you happy ever after. The showering of affection, attention and gifts is overwhelming, how can a man be so in love and into you .. Declared his love for me after two weeks of dating, I was the one as he quoted! The most beautiful woman in the world the woman of his dreams .. He love bombed me, my family and friends all in a matter of weeks. How did I not see the red flags? The truth starts at the beginning and the end but the middle is yet to be told.

My ex is actually a narcissist, a compulsive liar, a cheater, an emotionally abusive, manipulating, mentally unstable, steroid and Coke junkie, deadbeat dad and overall monster! Who stalked me, harassed me, bullied me, intimdated me, mentally and emotionally abused me, emotionally blackmailed me, manipulated me, cheated on me, forced entry into my home scarying me, controlled me and mentally controlled me, baited me, deflected his shit onto me, projected his shit onto me and overall fucked my head up, whilst leaving his daughter and I penniless, homeless and with no belongings! Who now blissfully ignores that his had a two year old daughter and lives his life with his fifth new girlfriend in a 11 month period playing Prince Charming boyfriend and stepdad. His a fake.

One hell of a year indeed.

My life turned upside down all because I loved a man who turned out to be a monster.

He plays victim whilst I am in the victim.

I will tell and write the truth because the truth always come out in the end. What’s in the dark will always come to light. One way or another.

This is my other and this is my time to tell the truth without being fearful of the consequences it may bring.

I am left with the emotional scars from an emotionally abusive man.

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